I chose this video for the song as well as the scene from the movie 'Spirit'. With the many different things that I am facing right now in my personal life, this really seemed to fit and I have adopted it this week as my theme song.
I have been incredibly blessed, and have had a lot of support, but there are still many choices that I have to make. Life has taught me that each choice I make today changes what my future will be tomorrow. Today I have a million options, and whatever I choose the options in front of me in the future narrow. Time is such a precious treasure that we have, and how we spend it really does determine many things. If I choose to make my children my priority, then they will remain my priority in the future. If I choose to spend my time with people that bring me down, in the future I may not be at all like I am today. Sometimes this choice can be hard, because I have moments where I would rather be around people then be completely alone. I have to look at things from the perspective of where will this take me?
As I face the road ahead, I plan to enjoy the journey and what I learn along the way. I have come to the point where I realize I will make mistakes, but, as long as I learn from them and do not repeat them, it is worth it. To gain experience in life does not always come through the good, easy, or fun things, but generally the hard ones, the ones that make you have to stretch and be more today then you were yesterday.
Stretching, or stressing, can be very painful. But, it is just growing pains. That is what I tell myself when I face things that I find uncertain and unnerving.
Many people say that I am a very patient person, but there are moments where I am not. And I often try to tell myself to ride it out, to wait for the results that come naturally, but I want to be done now, or it be over now, or somewhere else. However, if that were the case, then I would miss the best part, and that is going through it.
As I look back on my life, on the abuse during my childhood, and other severe experiences that I had, I am now thankful that they made me who I am today. I am more compassionate and understanding because I have been through my own personal hell many times through life. It is funny how when some learn about my experiences, that they are shocked that I am the way I am. They expect me to be bitter, or less of a person on the inside somehow, and that is exactly my point. If we learn from our experiences, we grow, and we can become whatever it is that we want to be regardless of the experiences that tried to trip us up along the way.